Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving http://tfl.nu/z8pa
  Replies (31) Good night (853) Bad night (3196)
• Favorite

  (409): View more from Texas

  Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (409): Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever. http://tfl.nu/fjfv
  Replies (12) Good night (863) Bad night (4083)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands. http://tfl.nu/svno
  Replies (16) Good night (3383) Bad night (1369)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (613): I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference.. http://tfl.nu/jwx4
  Replies (7) Good night (2368) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip http://tfl.nu/6k4u
  Replies (11) Good night (1609) Bad night (4695)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part. http://tfl.nu/bfoq
  Replies (8) Good night (714) Bad night (2703)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday... http://tfl.nu/4ejd
  Replies (8) Good night (1409) Bad night (524)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head. http://tfl.nu/xpy4
  Replies (9) Good night (2069) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is? http://tfl.nu/4m9k
  Replies (6) Good night (1169) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE. http://tfl.nu/6uku
  Replies (4) Good night (1272) Bad night (520)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny. http://tfl.nu/bodd
  Replies (9) Good night (814) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  That's me emphasizing the ridiculous

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS (808): That's me emphasizing the ridiculous http://tfl.nu/j8gk
  Replies (1) Good night (692) Bad night (259)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel http://tfl.nu/1v3g
  Replies (15) Good night (1232) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Real life dumb and dumber

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers (702): Real life dumb and dumber http://tfl.nu/6nu9
  Replies (3) Good night (720) Bad night (294)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples http://tfl.nu/ypsl
  Replies (3) Good night (185) Bad night (463)

Randomize