Texts From Last Night

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  (855): View more from

  somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs

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  (855): somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs http://tfl.nu/4p1d
  Replies (6) Good night (1565) Bad night (605)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend

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  (847): I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend http://tfl.nu/8y5y
  Replies (65) Good night (1580) Bad night (677)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF

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  (520): just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF http://tfl.nu/k653
  Replies (19) Good night (893) Bad night (4000)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle

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  (904): nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle http://tfl.nu/jw9o
  Replies (55) Good night (5349) Bad night (1500)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..

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  (832): I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete.. http://tfl.nu/bykt
  Replies (28) Good night (5508) Bad night (1449)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me

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  (703): Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me http://tfl.nu/ff5t
  Replies (8) Good night (2937) Bad night (989)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.

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  (713): So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink. http://tfl.nu/45mq
  Replies (4) Good night (1068) Bad night (704)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.

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  (404): I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success. http://tfl.nu/f7f6
  Replies (12) Good night (3470) Bad night (671)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.

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  (512): Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery. http://tfl.nu/4491
  Replies (4) Good night (1343) Bad night (803)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?

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  (580): Why is there a muffler in the livingroom? (405): First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance? http://tfl.nu/9zfd
  Replies (3) Good night (663) Bad night (1184)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles

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  (434): After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles http://tfl.nu/5yst
  Replies (6) Good night (980) Bad night (527)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty

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  (416): I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty http://tfl.nu/ufna
  Replies (6) Good night (407) Bad night (966)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.

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  (773): She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages. http://tfl.nu/3zgy
  Replies (2) Good night (388) Bad night (458)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  My legs feel like baby dolphins

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  (919): My legs feel like baby dolphins http://tfl.nu/f40w
  Replies (0) Good night (436) Bad night (173)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.

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  (612): Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today. http://tfl.nu/5bck
  Replies (3) Good night (485) Bad night (122)

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