You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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