he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
