threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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