After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
