your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
people are starting to question the shark bite story
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Randomize
