whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
