I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
