Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
