Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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