So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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