one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize