Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Dating After Heartbreak
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
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You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.