normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Randomize
