So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
