I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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