I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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