hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize