so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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