i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
