I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
40s are totally the cure
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?