No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
