I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
