I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
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