It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
