I wannas sexs uuuuu
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
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