You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
