A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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