It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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