READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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