she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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