i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
