just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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I need you to use more vowels.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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