my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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