i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
i think im in europe. pls send help
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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