dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
