Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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