the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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