Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
