fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize