Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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