So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize
