OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
