No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....