I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
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you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
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I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.