I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
