we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
