Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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