oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize