I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
