It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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