I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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