i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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